Sunday, July 4, 2010

Monday's Money Line

DBSF is proud to welcome Admiral DD Foot as a regular contributor. He will provide a weekly post on money lines, and will oversee content on relationship/ love/ sexting advice. From Admiral DD Foot:

Monday’s Money Lines: The following picks are for entertainment purposes only; unless you gamble, in which case they are your first step towards early retirement. (Picks are for 100 units on the money line unless otherwise noted).

SF@MIL: To counteract accusations that they have been playing soft the Milwaukee Brewers in an attempt to toughen their image are now spelling MILWAƜKEE with an umlaut. Pick: SF

ATL@PHI: Yahoo! Sports is reporting that the Phillies are still attempting to sign Pedro Martinez for the 2nd half. When approached by MML for comment Pedro said, “I think what the Phillies want is to ensure they beat the Mets. Over the past few years I have a great track record of beating the Mets.” Pick: ATL

CIN@NYM: When being pressed about overworking his starting pitchers and the danger of injury, Dusty Baker was quoted as saying, “Whether these guys get injured or not, I still get my paycheck.” Pick: CIN

FLA@LAD: Apparently not learning anything from the Fredi Gonzalez vs. Hanley Ramirez saga, the Marlins laundry guy was surprised when his “It’s me or Hanley” ultimatum did not go his way. Pick: LAD

LAA@CWS: White Sox GM Ken Williams on how he was handling the Carlos Zambrano situation. “We gave him a $10,000 fine. Well, a $5,000 fine for shoving Derek Lee and a $5,000 fine for shoving me when I told him about his $5,000 fine for shoving Derek Lee.” Pick: CWS

BAL@DET: After losing out on a no-hitter with 2 outs in the 9th inning on a botched call, Armando Galarraga has agreed to bury the hatchet with umpire Jim Joyce after he agreed to accompany Galarraga on a Tosh.0 Web Redemption. Pick: DET

CHC@ARZ: On the Karate Kid soundtrack Bananarama famously sang, “It’s a cruel….cruel…summer.” Bananarama were all Diamondback fans. Pick: CHC

BOS@TB: With so many Red Sox players dealing with the injury bug the Red Sox training and conditioning staff has been called into question. After further investigation it turns out that the real problem was the guy that drives the injury cart onto the field was the same guy that recklessly drove the ambulance onto the field in Madden ‘92.

CLE@TEX: After a very hot start Indian’s rookie catcher Carlos Santana was approached by MML for comment after a recent 0-8 slump where the Indians lost two games. Santana said, “I’m disappointed going 0-8 and losing both games, but for the first time, I really feel like a member of the Cleveland Indians.” Pick: TEX

NYY@OAK: After critical reviews of the New York State of Mind commercial for the new season of “Rescue Me,” Derek Jeter is going to be seen randomly driving through commercials for the 6:00 & 6:30 syndicated episodes of Seinfeld. Pick: NYY

KC@SEA: Reality trumps satire again with this week’s real Ichiro quote. “If I’m in a slump, I ask myself for advice.” One word; genius. Pick: SEA


  1. It's people who take time out of their presumably busy day to edit together a John Madden 1992 ambulance montage that make the internet special. The clarity of the graphics and the smooth transition between the Lions entire D line getting run over by an ambulance to the same fate affecting the Raiders O line in the following clip indicate that this auteur wasn't propping up a parent's camcorder in front of the TV but, rather, he/ she was using some truly advanced televisual technology.

  2. madden 92:

    cunningham 350 yards passing
    cunningham 100 yards rushing
    eagles fullback 100 yards rushing
    eagles halfback 100 yards rushing

    lots of onside kicks. 77-0. GET ON MY LEVEL.