Friday, May 7, 2010

Gilbert Arenas Released from Halfway House

After a month long sojourn in a Montgomery County halfway house, Gilbert Arenas was released to return home to the pool side fish tanks filled with sharks at his Virginia home. DBSF was curious why if Arenas committed a gun crime in DC did he get to take his sabbatical from not playing defense in Montgomery County? That's like when you crash your 1993 Toyota Corolla, and the repair shop only has a 2009 Land Rover for a loaner car.

More importantly, this month should have been a period of reflection and rehabilitation for Arenas, or so that's the criminal justice pitch. As a Wizards fan, DBSF hopes Arenas gained enlightenment on two areas. First, basketball is played on two sides of a court. There's offense, which DBSF believes Arenas has a sufficient hold on, and there's defense, which at times seems as foreign to Arenas as Oakland Raider wide receivers were to JaMarcus Russell over the past three years.

(You see Gilbert, you have to stand in front of the gentlemen with the ball, and make it as inconvenient as possible for him to put the ball through the hoop. No, no, DBSF recognizes the importance of etiquette and fellowship as well but, it is not in the Wizard's best interest for you to kindly direct--and at times even assist--the opposing player to his basket.)

Second, DBSF hopes Gilbert has increased his social networking skills. In particular, he should want to master meeting new people. Since he was last heaving up shots in a Wizards' uniform, two gentlemen left for Dallas, and another for Cleveland. He was close with all three. In their place are some good role players from Prince George's Community College's 2005-06 Maryland Junior College 4th place team. Perhaps Gilbert can request an extension on his stay in Montgomery County.

1 comment:

  1. Dear Mr. Dem Bammas,
    Regarding your previous post about Justin Smith [a prince among men, certainly], I have to ask whether or not you consider ping-pong and badminton periphery sports. I say no, while my friend J'Wanda is adamant that they are. Thank you in advance.