Thursday, August 26, 2010

An Homage to Andre the Giant


DBSF and a colleague were doing some Big John Studd research when we inevitably came across the Wikipedia page for Andre the Giant. It's worth 10 minutes of your time to read the whole thing but DBSF felt it was imperative to draw your attention to Andre's mythic beer drinking capabilities. His three all-time totals in one sitting are:

3. 119 12 ounce beers in 6 hours. Andre supposedly passed out and couldn't be moved so people just had to leave him there.

2. 197 16 ounce beers in one sitting. This was confirmed by Mike Graham and Dusty Rhodes, which is commensurate to getting word from Kim Jong-il that he has literally zero intention of building a nuclear arsenal.

1. The Fabulous Moolah, in her autobiography (yes, she has one, no this isn't DBSF 1980's satire) claims that Andre once drank 327 beers in a Reading, PA hotel bar. Walking in and seeing Andre the Giant sh*t-hammered with 250 beer cans while you thought you were just losing a weekend to some second cousin's wedding in nowhere Pennsylvania has to be probably the greatest pick-me-up ever.

To put 327 beers in perspective, consider the following. That's about 30.5 gallons or just less than 1 oil barrel of beer. Assuming there are 150 calories in a beer that comes out to 49,050 calories. Considering that the average 31-50 year old woman should consume 1,800 calories per day (2,200 for men) that means that Andre in one beer sitting consumed the caloric intake for 27.25 women.

For the second piss break between beers 156 and 157 Andre probably had to consume 3 or 4 beers just to fill the 11 minutes it took him to urinate.

5 comments:

  1. if dusty rhodes didn't wear that elbow pad (thank the lord!), somebody was gonna die.

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  2. Sorry DBSF, but when it comes to excessive consumption of beer - stuff that urban legends are made of - my money's on a real athlete, and a real hero - Wade Fucking Boggs.

    http://blogs.suntimes.com/sportsprose/2008/09/wade_boggs_and_the_best_drinki.html

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  3. While Boggs would drink 67 miller lites on a layover from Minnesoata to New York, Andre the Giant was crushing triple figure 16 ozs and passing out wherever he pleased with full knowledge that there wasn't sh*t anybody could do with a 7'4" 500 lb man once he crashed out.

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  4. I know we currently have a vacancy for the DBSF ombudsman when I switched from that position to regular contributor, but all of the Rules of Dignity which we operate under are still essential to our integrity.

    1) No disparaging of Brenda Walsh
    2) No disparaging the motherland
    3) ABSOLUTELY, NEVER, EVER make disparaging remarks about Reading, PA. My popularity has ebbed and flowed in various parts of the globe, but...........

    I'VE ALWAYS BEEN HUGE IN READING.

    ReplyDelete