Thursday, December 29, 2011

Atlanta Hawks: Best Backcourt of NBA Live 2001

DBSF was watching last night's Wizards-Hawks game when he noticed something. Now, DBSF normally watches Wizards games to follow John Wall's progress, to catch the monthly timeout where Nick Young actually looks at Flip Saunders in the team huddle and isn't smiling and/ or waving/ pointing to the crowd, to witness Jordan Crawford suffer from his internal struggle caused by his and only his conundrum that nobody else in the NBA can understand that he's LeBronesque, and (most often) to relive Andray Blatche's life of discontent. (With Blatche if he made his last ill-advised 15 footer then he's all smiles and high-fives; misses result in drooped-shoulder sulking, no eye-contact with teammates or coaches, and it being abundantly clear that the reason his man was wide-open for a dunk underneath the basket had nothing to do with Andray being out of position following some mid-range baseline fade away and everything to do with everyone on the team other than him.)

DBSF noticed that with the addition of Tracy McGrady and Jerry Stackhouse, the Hawks have the best back court--okay, maybe the best 2-3 combo--of any combination of players from NBA Live 2001 (hands-down probably the best basketball game on Nintendo 64 and Game Boy color). All they need to add is Garnett, Tim Duncan, and Dirk and the Hawks have the one through five that everyone cheated and traded for to go 82-0 and win the playoffs and finals in straight sets. (DBSF also recommends adding Juwan Howard, as NBA Live 2001 was prone to artificially injuring star players so there needs to be some, non-Lorenzen Wright/ Alan Henderson bench support. That and Juwan's fecundity--well, state ordered financial restitution associated with that fecundity--demands that he stay employed for wage-garnishing purposes.)

Of course the only problem with this plan is that its about to be 2012 and building a roster of stars from yester-decade might prove inadequate. Fortunately, it appears that the Hawks' management have hedged their bets. They've also added Vladimir Radmonovic, who is physically allergic (it induces bronchitis and the spins) to the defensive-side of the court, and retained Jason Collins, who the Hawks' management will eventually find out is still getting cut a check after which Jason will then be absorbing many cubic meters of space in some other non-athletic profession. Unfortunately for DBSF this Vince Youngesque Dream Team was too much and beat the Wizards by 18. In the Wizards' defense the score would have been much closer but Andray Blatche thought the game was 7:30 Mountain Standard Time--not EST--which limited his pre-game calisthenics and film study.     

1 comment:

  1. if i ever find that juwanna man who called out juwan on the herp i'll straight fight the bitch